So we are now week 4 into our new life and routine of work, childcare and mummy/daughter quality time. All is going well and in some ways maternity leave seems like a lifetime ago. It kind of feels like I have never been away from work and we all seem pretty settled into the new routine.
Something that does seem to have crept into our new life is what the professionals would call’ Separation Anxiety’. The need to see me or Mr P at any point when in the house and tears when being left with the childminder.
This was never an issue before but over the last few weeks I have noticed that as soon as you leave the room briefly we get a little cry. We always reassure her that we are there and now that she is on the move there is no reason why she can’t follow us. Most of the time she does follow us but there is still that little cry and look to say, ‘where are you going and why are you leaving me’.
I know this is text-book 9-10 months and that it is perfectly normal for her to feel like this so i am not too worried. I am hoping it will be one of those things like other things that have happened in the past 10 months that we don’t even realize has stopped.
What does help is having the reassurance of her childminder who updates me every evening I collect her telling me that after five minutes of leaving she was happily playing with the other children and the dog and probably didn’t even remember what she was upset about!
In a slight moment of weakness i did Google ‘Separation Anxiety’ and was stupidly pleased to read,
Remember, it’s only natural for your baby to feel anxious without you, so there’s no reason to feel guilty when you need to get on with other parts of your life. In fact, separation anxiety is usually a sign of how well you have bonded with them.
I think as parents we are constantly playing the guilt game on ourselves and to leave a crying baby with somebody as you try to block it out and head to work just adds to this. I have tried to be as practical as I can though. I know that she will be fine and is fine. I think at one point last week i felt guilty for not feeling bad! We can’t win!
So we carry on and hope that it doesn’t last too long but just going with it if it does take a little longer. We have lots to look forward to in the coming months with the big first birthday, our first proper Christmas (one where I won’t spend so much time sat in a chair with a baby attached to my boob!) and the anticipation and excitement of when those first steps may happen!
My Pinterest app is already full of party ideas and there is a running list of ideas on my Amazon wish list! Party planning/Xmas shopping here i come!